Boom To Bu'r'st : Mumbai's Spirit

Boom To Bu'r'st : Mumbai's Spirit ( written on 17th July 2006)

Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom.

That's all it took to take so many innocent lives in a matter of minutes. Innocent lives. Their only mistake was their wretched fate! Mine wasn't. I survived.

I could have been one of the several who did not survive. Just a matter of 10 minutes between tragedy and me. That's how close it got. But I survived. Fate.

Now, I am sitting here just because we had a small lecture, which wasn't scheduled. It came out of the blue, like an angel. I didn't reach Dadar at my diurnal time and survived.

At that moment, as I waited for the train to arrive on platform 5, I cursed the train for being late. I didn't know yet what had transpired just a few miles away. It was 6:30. There was a bit of uncertainty and commotion on the platform. A train stood still 200 meters from the platform and all its passengers were on the track. As I listened to Yunhi Chala Chal Rahi, I heard the booming announcement " All trains on platform 1 and 3 for Andheri, Borivali and Virar have been suspended. I asked around and prompt came the reply "Bomb blast between Matunga and Mahim." I just couldn't believe it. I laughed and muttered that it must be a rumor. But as the minutes ticked by, the feeling began to sink in. It had actually happened. I ran outside to get an alternate way back. I cursed my luck. Just a few days back I was stranded in the deluge and had to walk my way back in knee-deep water. Now here I was, in Dadar surrounded by hoards and hoards of people, rushing to catch Taxis or Buses. The heavens had opened up.

It started raining so heavily that Umbrellas were losing the battle and people succumbing to the forces of nature. It was as if God was crying. It was amazing how it happened 5 minutes after the 7 blasts. Sometimes God gives us signs. But that made my life even tougher. The whole road was blocked with cars, Taxis and buses galore. I decided that I would walk and so I did. But the rain made even that difficult. I was still cursing God for the troubles he was putting me through. As I walked from Dadar to bandra, I saw many a people voluntarily giving others lift in their AC cars and a few who didn't even look towards the poepl banging on their windows, asking for help. The Buses were as packed as the Virar local just bombed.

I talked to a man who was walking alongside me towards Bandra. He was shaking his head with disbelief. I asked him whether he lived in Bandra. He told me he did, but it was no use going home and trying to sleep. He told me that after seeing the river of blood on the tracks at Mahim, something had died within him. He couldn't shake that image from his mind. I took shelter in a shop when the rain was pelting humungous drops on my umbrella and its condition had further deteriorated. There a man stood smoking a cigarette. He was angry. He wanted to kill those people who had killed such innocent people. He looked at a Muslim who walked by and passed a derogatory comment. He blamed that guy. I couldn't stand there any longer so I thought it would be easier to bare the wrath of God. A deluge of concerned phone calls inundated me, as I marched towards Bandra.

Once I reached there, I saw a group of Muslims coming towards me. My heart jumped for a second. I was afraid the situation might have turned sour. They stood in the middle of the road and forced an empty Taxi to park on the side. I was convinced now that there was a danger much devastating than the blast, ready to unleash. But I was proved wrong. Those people were actually packing into the Taxis and running to help the victims. I thanked God, but still my hurting legs reminded me of the problem he had put me through.

I reached safely and unwound. Uptill now I had not thought about the implications nor my fortune. I had just thought about my misfortune. As images ran on the TV, I realized how lucky I had been. 10 minutes earlier and I would have been sprayed on the tracks.

I realized the importance of those 10 minutes when I reached home the next day and my Mom hugged me. The tension of the past day found a release in tears. We went to the nearest Gurudwara and thanked God for saving me. All this time the feeling had not sunk in. The papers flashed News of the Mumbai spirit. I saw people being interviewd in the Train as I sat there in my living room. I felt proud. The city was back on its feet.

The next day as I woke up to get ready for college, that feeling that I would be in a train in an hours time brought a strange feeling in my chest. My heart raced, The So called pride and spirit, had turned to fear. All the way to the train I was contemplating taking a bus. But I knew that I could have run, but could never hide. If not the train, the bus could be targeted. I decided to stick to the train. It wasn't bravery; I had taken it in my stride. I felt helpless. As I boarded the train which was as packed as it usually is, I noticed a man with a big bag boarding the train. I couldn't stop this feeling of fear growing inside me. What if that guy was a bomber? I would be dead. I closed my eyes and gave in. I thought to myself "So be it". But Dadar arrived without incident. I noticed people watching each other's carefully. All traveled in complete silence and kept an eye on each other's belongings. How can you feel safe in this city? The question ran through each ones mind.

As I read each article of Mumbai Spirit in the papers, my eyes turned moist. At that moment rage had erupted within me. I couldn't stand this farce. Who were we trying to impress. This was no spirit; it was pure necessity and helplessness. We traveled by train because we had to. The rage wasn't just centered at the politicians who were just trying to disown responsibility; it was at the level of helpless ness we have reached. We have become totally numb to such disasters. We have given up totally on the system. Aisa hi hota raha hai, aisa hi hote rahega!! This feeling is the vermin that is eating us from within. We have put our hands up and it doesn't matter to us whether the government perfoms, or the civic body performs or the security system performs. We have become impotent. I got out of that train feeling distraught. Everywhere I looked I saw danger. I felt vulnerable.

The evening time was even worse. I had completely resigned to my Fate and deliberately boarded the Virar local at 6:20 from Dadar.Call it being foolhardy or being plain stupid. Maybe I had become too emotional. But at that moment I had decided, if death was what was written, so be it. The train was uncharacteristically empty. At this time usually I couldn't even have thought of getting inside. The men in this train are usually packed like sardines, but today it wasn't. I gave myself 13 more minutes to die, the time within which I would reach Andheri and start believing in life again. The person behind me received his call. He said " bus? Why bus? It would take me an eternity to reach home. Don't worry. I will be home safe and sound" I imagined how worried his wife would be. I imagined how people would be feeling when their near and dear ones would leave for their daily job. As if they were in the army, ready to fight a war. I imagined how mom would have felt when I was at Dadar station on that day. I imagined her relief when I reached home safely. Andheri arrived and I thanked God again. I knew that this fear would not die easily, this concern would not w\vanish in a hurry (not even at the pretence of Mumbais spirit). I knew that I would have to send 2 smses to Mom.One After I reached Dadar and the other when I reached Vidyavihar for a long time to come…..

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p.s: Lets just think of options to make this city a secure place.

I have thought of one.: India is very late but it can still start giving people SSN social security numbers as In many countries. All the details of each person should be available on police records. Fingerprints, past details, criminal record. Its imperative that they think of some line of finding the culprits. Maybe they wont have all on record in a short time. But slowly they can build their database. Its can be vital in tracking people.